Recently I was sitting in my daughter's rocking chair. She rested on my shoulder, arms around my neck, her breaths collecting warmth in the crook of my collar bone. As I finished her song, You Are My Sunshine, she sleepily looked up at me. As clear and confidently as she could, she whispered, "Mommy, this is home."
"Yes, Reese," I smiled. "This is home." She continued though. "Mommy and Daddy and Pierson and me, we live here. Mommy goes to work, and Daddy works, but this is home. This is my room, and my bed, and my home, forever." I patted her back and for a second I wondered if she felt insecure that perhaps we were going somewhere else. Or maybe she questioned if we would be together, for the rest of our lives?
But the next night she said it too and so joyfully. I then realized there was something consoling in her words. Through my two-year old baby girl, I was reminded once more, that no matter where we are, what is going on in life, and what position our heart may be in--we are together and together is home.
Lately I have been pondering, "What are the things that light my soul on fire?" and there are clear, specific thoughts each time:
-Writing
-Envisioning my future farmhouse, land and horse
-Photos and the stories that they capture
-and my family
Louisville, Kentucky is where I have called home the past ten years. But, I also call Michigan my home. Having been born and raised there, and spending my first eighteen years in a quaint, country town, it will forever be home. I honestly question that we will ever find our 'dream home' in this city or state. I just don't know if it exists and the longer we spend time in the neighborhood we are in, the more I hear the voice of God saying, "You won't live here forever." I have found contentment for the time being, but still, I just don't know.
Sometimes, having dreams and passions are hard. It's like I have these tiny little video compartments inside my brain, and they're playing in the background all the time. I see the future house, the green grass, the old barn, the horse that runs there and I also see myself sitting at my desk, pencil in hand, journaling often and transferring those thoughts here. But what am I supposed to do with them? Lara Casey says, "Know that this is a process--Put your focus where God wants it, in His timing, not letting fear keep you from taking leaps of faith. Do what matters and forget the rest...there is only ONE path to purpose: Jesus."
Who KNOWS where we will end up? My husband despises driving through Indiana to get to Michigan but jokes, "Watch... our future horse farm is going to end up being here." (We both DEEPLY hope that's not the case, ha!) But maybe it'll be Tennessee, or back to Michigan, or a completely random state like Texas? And regardless of where the next house is at geographically, regardless of how God allows me to use my gifts, I will trust the path that Jesus walks us down. When we are there and while we are here, I know that I can hold my children and husband's hands and say:
"This is home."
How is your heart, friends? I am always available to pray for you and with you if you feel like sharing! Send me an e-mail, comment below, or find me on Facebook! And what places or people are home to YOU?
