My 4-Year Old Isn't Fat

"Mommy, look at my belly! It's sitting up! (means sticking out) Maybe there's a baby in there!"

My son was looking at the photo I had just taken of him and his little sis eating their ice cream cones. I actually laughed loudly because he said it with such vigor and exclamation, but now I'm re-thinking that decision.

The very next night he was taking a shower with my husband after they had spent a long time gardening. "Daddy, look how FULL my belly is! Maybe I shouldn't eat breakfast or lunch tomorrow?" he asked. My husband bent over to be on his level and said, "Oh, Buddy Boy. You're perfect how you are! You're growing and it's wonderful!"

Later my husband and I privately talked.

"Where would he have learned a question like that?"

"Do you think he's insecure?!"

Maybe we're overreacting. Perhaps it really wasn't a big deal and he's simply starting to recognize that his tummy expands after he eats a meal. But oh my heart... how I pray the feelings of insecurity AWAY from my sweet, dear boy!

We don't talk negatively about body image in our house. Before they were born we agreed that we would fight tooth and nail to not let them hear the word "fat" or "awful" or "too big," when referring to ourselves. Brave, strong, courageous, handsome, cute... those are the adjectives we use more often than not when loving on them. Behind our walls, may they never feel the weight of insecurities.

But we all know that can't really happen. Someday they'll go off to school. Kids will be mean and say hurtful things. They'll get their first zit, they'll be made more aware of society's 'ideal image' for men and women. But how fervently I pray that their worth is never found in their physical characteristics alone.

It could have been nothing.

It's probably no big deal.

Even though I will fight to help him feel so incredibly wonderful, just the way he is, my heart aches at just the thought of my barely 4-year old son thinking that perhaps he should eat less to stop his belly from growing.

Worn: Athleta©

When Athleta reached out to me for this collaboration, let's just say I was a *little* excited.... okay, who am I kidding, I was thrilled! If you haven't yet worn a piece of their clothing, you absolutely must get a few pieces from this collection. Check the captions below some of the pictures for direct links to the items worn! 

Top: High Neck Stripe Chi Tank

Shoes: Scout Slip On Sneaker Dr. Scholl's

Top: Highline Sweater Tunic 
Bottoms: Cozy High Wasted Metro Legging

Sweater: Kennewick Crew Sweater

Button Down: Headlands Shirt

Top: Open Knit Wrap

I have nothing but excellent things to say about Athleta and their brand. As a very busy mom of two, I long for comfort, quality, and something that looks great while being BOTH of those things. Thanks, Athleta for this opportunity and ya'll, SERIOUSLY go get yourself some of these amazing outfits! 

Let's Be BAD Moms!

I don't go to the movies. Like, ever. So when my sister in law said she'd go with me to see Bad Moms in the theatre, I was super ecstatic. I don't know about you and where you live, but movie tickets are way too dang overpriced here in Kentucky. I grew up where tickets cost $5 and a giant diet coke was $3 (oh, and we had free refills!) Before walking in to the theatre, I had some definite pre-movie-attending-anxiety. 

Please don't suck. Don't be a waste of time. Please be worth every single cent we just spent to get in here and slurp on our $7 soft drinks!

But lo and behold, seconds into the movie both of us were dying laughing. Don't get me wrong, the F Bomb is dropped every five seconds but oh.my.gosh soooooooo worth it! The main character (played by Mila Kunis) seems to have the "perfect life", but just like most moms, she's completely over-worked, exhausted and way over-committed. She meets two women, who couldn't be more opposite from one another, and together they have some way overdue fun encompassed by tons of laughter and tears. 

As the movie ended I thought, I have to write about this! And then I received a Facebook message from a dear friend of mine who solidified this need to write even more. 

"Do all moms feel like they could be better moms? Or do I just suck...After I put her to bed and she's lying next to me (yes, she sleeps with me), I look back on the day and see all the wasted opportunities for her to learn and grow and for us to grow together, because I had other shit to do. And I see this angel, God's GIFT to me, peaceful beside me, and I feel like the biggest f'ing asshole..." 

Ladies? How many of you are RIGHT THERE? 

"I feel like a bad mom. I feel like I could be better. Like she deserves BETTER. I don't know how anyone does it, if you're not a millionaire who doesn't need to work or cook or clean or pay bills...I don't have childhood memories with my mom. She was working or grumpy. That's what I am? I'm THAT?!? I don't want to be that. I don't want to be too tired or too grumpy or too BUSY. It isn't fair."

Isn't that what we all are? We are tired, we are grumpy, we are busy. We are MOMS. WHY are we so hard on ourselves? In this day and age, it seriously IS pretty impossible to be a good mom. These lines in the movie had me splitting up and also need to be said here:

"There are so many f'ing rules now" 
"Don't punish your kids." 
"Don't say NO to your kids." 
"We all work too damn hard trying to make our kids lives amazing and magical. Their lives already ARE amazing and magical. Screw it. Let's be BAD moms." [Kiki, Carla and Amy from Bad Moms]

Maybe it'll help you if I offer some personal perspective. Guess what my four year-old wants to eat EVERY SINGLE DAY? I'll give you a guess: NOT spinach and kale.. Nope. Try Pizza Luncheables. And the first thing my kids do when they wake up in the morning? Use their iPads for 15 minutes (cough, or thirty, cough) so that I can drink my coffee and keep my talking to a minimum. I hate mornings! What in the world am I going to do when I stay home full time come  this winter?! Oh, probably the same thing. 

Does it make me a bad mom because I allow Luncheables to be "lunch" three days a week? Or that I give them screen time when I need a break? (If you say yes, we probably shouldn't be friends....) 

This job is HARD. It's emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually EXHAUSTING. We work jobs outside of the home and come home to more work, or we stay home and there's a crap ton that go unnoticed by the littles ones we are raising. And no matter what your other titles are, I can tell you that being the Maid, Chef, Nurse, Handyman, Therapist, Friend, Pooper Scooper, Professional Cuddler, Discipliner and so freeking much more... all roll into a giant combustion of what MOM really is. 

But yet, we feel guilt. We don't want to be remembered for our yelling, for our tears, for our frustration. We want our kids to have these picturesque memories of rainbows and sunshine and kitten cuddles and nothing but laughter as they tell THEIR kids what their childhood resembled. Well I'm here to encourage you--be a BAD mom! 

Take care of yourself. While your kids play hide and seek go lock yourself in the bathroom for three minutes to breathe and have some positive self-talk. Make arrangements to go out with a girlfriend and do whatever the HECK you want. Laugh. Cry. Punch a punching bag. Go for a run. Eat a pint of ice cream. And then keep being Mom. 

I bet you're doing the best you can. I know my friend who sent me that message is! She is a woman who I admire immensely, who has always been a go-getter, working herself through college and raising a kid at the same time. I bet you get angry and your kids have seen you cry. I bet you've raised your voice at them and screamed for them to go to their rooms. I bet you've had to apologize and ask for forgiveness and grace. And I also bet you have hugged them, and danced with them and taken them out for ice cream and slushies and to the theatre where they can have THEIR very own bucket of popcorn and too big of a soft drink. 

So ladies? Why don't we breathe? Give yourself a pat on the back and go ahead, give yourself slack, "I'm going to be a BAD mom!" 

Mommy, Come Look at My Poop

'I'm sorry, what?!' is probably what you're thinking after reading my title. And I don't blame you. But if anyone wants to know what the current season looks like in the Glass household, it can literally be summed up by those six words. 

When you are a parent and you have begun potty training, I promise you there will be an orchestra of applause when your Little One decides to finally GO on the toilet. Pee is good and great but poop, that's a whole other story. Especially for my son, who was honest to God terrified to go #2 on the toilet for almost an entire YEAR after he was regularly using it for pee, (and he started doing that as soon as he turned two); any time he mustered up the courage, we would run in to the bathroom and cheer, "Yay!! Look at your poop! You did SO good, Buddy!!" or something along those lines. 

It wasn't much different for our daughter, though pooping for her was never even close as big of a deal for her. We still applauded and cheered her on and encouraged her to keep using the potty because she was such a big girl. Mommy and Daddy were SO proud, and we're still super ecstatic when after nap or bed there is no nasty brown stuff in their diapers! Poop--it's a BIG DEAL! And it'll be a GOOD day here when we can officially kiss diapers goodbye. 

So this summer, ya'll know there's been a ton of sickness here. There's been lots of cleaning, organizing, de-cluttering, disinfecting, and apparently, pooping. A few weeks ago my husband and I laughed out loud after our almost 3-year old daughter used the bathroom. She had indeed gone #2 and BOTH kids, Lord help us, will yell, "I POOOOOPED!" from the potty because they obviously still need help wiping. (LOL Guys, parenthood, it's SO glorious!) I was the closest and I exclaimed something like, "Wow, Reese! That's a big one! Good JOB!" and she screamed at the top of her lungs, "DAD! DAAAD! COME LOOK AT MY POOP!" 

"When did our life come to this?!" he joked after going to admire his daughter's bowel movement. "Mommy, come look at my poop, that is SERIOUSLY what this summer has consisted of!" I laughed. 

And then we were cleaning the living room. He moved the couch so I could vacuum behind it. "Hold on a sec," he said. "There's something brown and kind of gunky there we need to clean up." I went to get paper towels. "It's probably chocolate," he said. "Or gosh! I HOPE it's chocolate?!?" ONLY in a house of toddlers, could this be ones' life. Chocolate? Or poop? Only one way to find out. 

Lord have mercy. What does your average day look like with young ones? I mean seriously, the STUFF we hear ourselves say that you just cannot even fathom until you are wearing those shoes!!

For instance: 

-Don't bite your brother's butt. 
-Stop threatening to hit your daddy in the penis.
-No, you may not pee in the bathtub. 
-Do NOT fart on me! 
-Do not put your head in the toilet EVER again. (my recent favorite)

I mean, there's probably a hundred different Pinterest boards that all consist of the funny things kids say, but it's so true. In all honesty, wiping butts is NOT glorious. Cleaning up vomit is every parents nightmare, teaching your son how to aim IN to the toilet to pee is a chore, explaining to your daughter why she CANNOT and SHOULD NOT pee OUTSIDE all the time is just absolutely not something you ever think of when you're in the beginning stages of, "Aww won't it be fun to start a family someday? A mini you, a little me, all mixed into one? It'll be SO cute and so fun." No. Not. at. ALL. But if you're a parent than you are right here with me in saying I really can't think of a great blessing than being Mom. 

Sure, it'll be a good day when they learn how to wipe their own butts. And if I know my family, we will forever be comparing poop sizes... but good Lord how deep they love and how hard they make us laugh! Leave a comment below with something funny your child has said or even something YOU said as a kid that your parents still tease you about. 

"Dad, did they call you Dad when you were a kid?" -Sean [my big brother]